Dressing Comfortably: Size and fit aren't the only key factors
Comfort always comes first. But what does that truly mean?
I’ll start by saying this: please make sure your clothes fit you properly. Yes, the actual size of your clothing and the fit (the right length for your torso, the hem length and so on) matter very much. I have longer legs, so finding the right fit of jeans was fun growing up. It is important to pay attention to how your clothes are fitting—I want to be clear on that.
But what happens after you get dressed and leave out for work, school, a date or special event? Are you truly comfortable in the clothes you have on? Or are you a bit unsure about the choices you made? Many years ago I observed interesting behavior from women who wore crop tops. The trend came in hot—fo
r a while it seemed like I couldn’t find a full-sized shirt anywhere! Also fun. Anyway, the trend of short tops, which doesn’t seem to be going away in the near future, was and continues to be worn by people everywhere. But I noticed a little something that I couldn’t unsee: various women and young girls wearing cropped tops while self-consciously covering the midsection of their stomachs that were revealed. Hm. HMMM! Isn’t it the point of the cropped top to show off the mid-drift area? Didn’t you know that part of your body would be shown when you put the half-shirt on? Why hide now? Wear it with confidence! I would shout in my head at random people I’d see bashfully covering themselves.
What gives? Well, it’s because they aren’t comfortable wearing the clothes they have on. You see, when you get dressed, there’s a moment when you look into the mirror and you either love what you see or there’s a slight lack of confidence. That lack of confidence reveals itself through body language. And we can see the ways in which the body speaks— in our shoulders, our stride, our crossed arms, our shifty eyes…This subtle language says all that needs to be said regardless of how well the clothes fit our bodies.
It is my observation that, sometimes, our clothes can make or break us. I know—that’s a controversial statement. But is it really that wrong to say? I think about the reason why fashion stylists and image consultants exist: to help those who express a lack of confidence or low self-esteem build up their confidence through wardrobe changes. Though not always the case, some people who seek out a stylist are likely struggling in areas around confidence and feeling their best. Yet, something amazing happens when you put on your best color or your most flattering silhouette and you start to really feeling yourself. Watch and pay attention to your body language and how it’s speaking to you. Do you smile when you see yourself? Does the outfit make you want to twirl or broaden your shoulders? Do you feel comfortable?
Comfort in dressing really just comes down to our varying levels of confidence. Because on the flip side of this argument, I know folks who, including myself, have worn not-so-flattering clothes with the most confidence who did not break over a garment. The real question is: are you comfortable and confident in your own skin? If you had to wear a potato sack, could you do it? Itchiness aside. Our confidence cannot come from the clothing. It absolutely has to come from within. It has to come from a place that loves the way your body curves or slopes or bulges or flexes. That type of love for the self must be able to show that love despite what society has to say. And once you achieve that level of true self-care and love, nothing can break you. Especially not a cropped top.